


Michael, In The Bathroom

by homestuckersunited



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz
Genre: Basically just michael in the bathroom but not in the form of a song, Be More Chill - Freeform, Crying and flashbacks ensue, Idk yet but probably, M/M, Maybe some cliches too, Trans Michael Mell, Uhhhh idk how to tag shit, anyway this is sad, bmc, boyf riends — Freeform, meremy hell
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-06
Updated: 2017-09-06
Packaged: 2018-12-24 11:39:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 977
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12011952
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/homestuckersunited/pseuds/homestuckersunited
Summary: Michael Mell is hanging in the bathroom at the biggest party of the fall. His best friend of twelve years and crush of four, Jeremy Heere, has completely abandoned him.This is how he reacts (from the perspective of me, the author) in a way that's a bit more detailed than the song.





	Michael, In The Bathroom

**Author's Note:**

> Yeah i was bored and depressed and this was the result. A kick in the feels for everyone else.  
> You're welcome, boyf riends fandom. Enjoy your feels soup. It's very cold, just like my heart :^)

"... Get out of my way.. Loser.", Jeremy spat harshly at Michael, who until just a moment ago was blocking the bathroom door, as he shoved past him and out into the hall. 

Michael just stared into space in disbelief, frozen in place. That is, before he realized he'd been still as a statue for a few seconds and should probably move, or at least shut the door. The latter won the quick debate he had in his head.

Once the door was shut, he pressed his back against it with a shaky sigh, only now realizing that there were tears streaking his face. He didn't care.

Then, there was a knock. He stiffened at the sound until he heard the voice of the person who'd knocked and was able to confirm that it wasn't the boy who'd just left him there.

"Hello? Some of us have to pee!" 

Jenna Rolan. 'It's just her..', he thought.

"I'm having my period..!", he replied, making his voice sound a bit higher to be more convincing, which wasn't too hard. He also wasn't really lying. 

"Take your time, honey!", he heard her call back. Once he was sure she was gone, he slid down onto the floor and pulled his knees to his chest as he went over the events that had just taken place. 

Michael had crashed this party to warn Jeremy about the SQUIP and how it would completely fuck up his head and life. Clearly, it had already started to do both. But Jeremy, too focused on "improving" his life and winning Christine's affection, accused Michael of being jealous and called him a loser before leaving him there. "It almost doesn't feel real..", he mumbled to himself, clutching the sleeves of his sweater. 

He felt like his heart had been ripped out and crushed into dust. He ran a hand through his hair and tried to slow his breathing and heart rate a bit. He knew he needed to get out of this house and back to his own, but he couldn't even leave the bathroom in the state he was in. 'I gotta calm down..' he thought. But the more he tried not to think, the more he thought.

The first thing that popped into his head was when he first met Jeremy. Neither of them were as awkward back then, and they had clicked instantly even though they were only four or five. From then on, they did almost everything together.

After a few minutes, he stood up shakily, using the door for support, and walked over to the sink. He stared at himself in the mirror, more memories popping up. 

This one was from when Jeremy had the flu. He was sick as a dog, but Michael stayed with him anyway. He brought him his favorite snacks and drinks and they played video games together. Michael inevitably got sick as well, and Jeremy gladly returned the favor.

"Fuck.." he muttered as he wiped the tears from his face, though it didn't fix much as he was still crying with no sign of stopping. 

It was when they were about thirteen that Michael came out to Jeremy as ttrangender. Jeremy, being his best friend, was the first to know. He was completely supportive and immediately stopped calling Michael by his deadname. Around the same time, Michael realized he was most definitely still into guys as well, making him both trans and gay, which he also told Jeremy. The same reaction; unconditional love and support. It was times like those that Michael was incredibly grateful that he had someone like Jeremy in his life.

Another knock at the door. Michael froze.

He had hoped it would go away, but it only got louder. He took a deep breath after a few seconds and splashed some water in his face, grounding himself as best he could. But when he wiped his face and went to open the door, the knocking stopped.

Walking over to the toilet and sitting on the lid, Michael let out another sigh. 'Just a few more minutes..'

Not too long after he came out, he started to notice things about Jeremy that he hadn't before. The way his expression brightened when he spotted Michael in a crowd, how his nose scrunched up when he laughed, Jeremy grabbing Michael's hand and leading him places, the way his smile and laugh made Michael's heart soar, those days when Jeremy's hair fell just the right way and framed his face perfectly, and oh s h i t Michael had a huge crush on him.

But eventually, Michael had to realize that it was a lost cause. Jeremy was straight, and besides, it was around then that he had started talking about Christine.

Christine... The name echoed in Michael's head, making him clench his teeth. Of course she didn't deserve his resentment, but Michael couldn't help but detest that girl. After all, she was the target of Jeremy's affection, and not only that, but she didn't even realize how lucky she was to have someone so wonderful care about her so much.

"Why... Why can't he love me like he loves her...", he mumbled, trying his best not to cry harder. All of this started because Jeremy was obsessed with this girl who had barely ever even given him the time of day. "He's so fucking stupid.."

It took him awhile longer, but he eventually choked back his tears and rose to his feet. 'It doesn't matter anymore..' he wiped his face on his sleeve. 'He doesn't give a shit about me anymore. The best thing to do now is to go home and try to forget all of this.. Dwelling on it won't do a damn thing.'

Slowly but surely he made his way to the door and opened it, exiting the bathroom and then the house.

**Author's Note:**

> Ik this is kinda lame, but who ever said vent writing was any good? I mean, my normal writing is bad too, but still.


End file.
